Your Sanity

We'll all come back to those same walls one day.

~We're all mad. ~

They say they will help you find your sanity. 

But you know you're already free.

You strive so hard to be perfect, 

But they just stick you with labels: "mad."

Soon you are confined within their walls.

Through your fragile ears, they blast their static.

You try to switch it off, but they pump more static

Because they don't understand your sanity.

The world is closing in and so are these white walls.

You're suffocating, but they say you need to to be free.

It makes you want to rebel. You're so mad,

and you still strive so hard to be perfect.

They'll feed you lies, but your air is already a perfect 

treat. You take it down and just taste the static.

You start falling deeper, growing tired and more mad.

Struggling, you slowly start to give up your own sanity.

Now you're breaking, losing the free

will you once had outside these white walls.

They give you a white coat to match their walls.

They yell things about you not being normal or perfect.

You're bound by their chains to never be free.

You tried to hold firm and always stay static.

But they're playing with fire and your own sanity

so much that it makes you wonder if you really are mad.

Now you're raging and hiding rituals, Mad

at yourself for getting so bad and falling into these walls.

How did you lose your own sanity

so quickly? How was your perfect 

so imperfect? You think as they feed you more static.

You let them take control cause you'll never be free.

Remember when they finally let you free?

That day, all your demons agreed: you are mad.

You were a good little girl and mimicked their static.

They let you out, but you etched your name on their walls

so they'll never forget you. You can't be perfect.

You know you'll be back here next time you lose your sanity.

Now you're free,

but you know you'll be back in these walls.

You know you'll be mad

once again striving to find "perfect."

They'll try to cure you, more static,

but you'll never be cured

This is your sanity.

Tables

You have the same thing on your minds, but you'll both never know.

~ Pick up the phone. ~

I watch the cars leave the driveways.

They speed away towards lives you'll never know.

You hear the rain on your window,

Drops so delicate, like the edges of my dress now frayed.

You go downstairs to a stale cup of coffee.

I stare at my bowl, like it holds some kind of warning.

My eyes on inked words, it's just another morning.

You turn your head to my chair, but I'm not there.

You have the taste of liquor in your mouth.

I have the taste of words I said.

We sit at our tables thinking about things we regret.

Only one day, but feels like forever now.

A ring is taunting you from the other room.

A tan line is taunting me on my left ring finger.

The ghosts of our words unsaid still linger,

Thick like humidity from a storm in the afternoon.

We're at different tables in scattered places,

But we sit together on opposite sides.

We sit here and contemplate changing our minds.

It can't be over. We've left far too many traces. 

I reach for the phone.

You put it down.

The rain pours outside.

Is it all over now?

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The Land of No Return

Everyone has been to their own land of no return before.

~ Come back. ~

I was relying too much on the demons that plagued me.

A thousand times I bled, thinking it the only way to save me.

They kept cutting deeper, and I relied on the beautiful pain.

I slipped more into your darkness, thinking it was the only way.

Thinking it was the only way.

There have been thorns on roses we've been so daring to touch.

They left scars on our calloused hearts, but our minds became drugged.

So, we took on a strange addiction, quickly stealing our souls away.

We've been persuaded we would stay static, but out minds became insane.

Quickly stealing our souls away.

We've gone to the Land of No Return, falling down a thorny rabbit hole.

We've seen such visions and actions that only we're smart enough to know.

Time and time again, we've become accustomed to the same pattern.

We still like to play with fire, but only so we can feel the burn.

Accustomed to the same pattern. 

But this is the way that we needed it to be, isn't it?

Isn't it the demons and the chaos that we found complete comfort in?

Aren't they the ones who helped us cope when we thought we couldn't?

No. In reality, we shot the gun as we were taking their bullets.

Taking their bullets.

We're all relying too much on the demons that plague us.

Bleeding a thousand times, they'll never save us.

It seems as though we're all just slaves to our own afflictions.

We're old enough now to learn to break free from our additions.

Break free from our addictions.

The Land of No Return seems like such a beautiful place.

I've learned it is just a hideout for all the demons we won't face.

Now we're not fooled by a craving so tempting and taunting. 

We realized there was something much better we could be wanting. 

So tempting and taunting. 

I've been to The Land of No Return and back again. 

It's an experience not many can comprehend.

We're back now, but afraid we'll find it again one day. 

At least now we know that it's not the only way. 

Not the only way. 

Off With Her Head

We find ourselves craving the insanity of the past to ease our minds.

~ There's no remedy. ~

I'm haunted by my additions. 

I let demons take over my brain.

I like feeling the afflictions

Of how the ghosts course in my veins.

Some think I'm insane,

But sanity is just a definition, 

A mode for society to tame.

I think I'm losing my head.

I'm falling deeper down the hole.

They don't understand the world that only I know.

They see me sipping from your tea again.

So, they scream, "Off with her head!"

"Off with her head!"

I've tried to get them to understand,

But my words get lost in the haze.

My illusions take me to a wonderland.

I'm at peace in my dystopian state.

Some think I need to be saved,

But safety is a state of mind,

A feeling our brain creates.

I think I'm losing my head.

I'm falling deeper down the hole.

They don't understand the world that only I know.

They see me sipping from your tea again.

So, they scream, "Off with her head!"

"Off with her head!"

I follow you down.

I follow you down time after time. 

I think I'm in control. 

I follow you down. 

Are you controlling my mind?

I think I'm losing my head.

I'm falling deeper down the hole.

They don't understand the world that only I know.

They see me sipping from your tea again.

So, they scream, "Off with her head!"

"Off with her head!"

I follow you down.

So, they scream, "Off with her head!"

I follow you down.

And then,

Off with my head.

Bottle

It's so easy to fade back into the past.

~ Don't relapse. ~

You grab the bottle,

Like so many times before.

I lock my door now,

Like all the signs we ignored.

You're in the next room

Casting your own thunderstorm.

I'm hiding under my umbrella

Casting traps onto the floor.

You say it's one last time,

And I believed you.

I say there's one last line,

And you know I'll keep you. 

You grab the lighter, 

Filling lungs with black lies.

I open a window,

Filling this twisted paradise.

You're so close now,

Reaching out your hand to meet me.

I'm barely standing,

Reaching for your mind to appease me.

You open my door,

Trying to get me to come out.

I step back a little,

Trying to see if you mean it now.

You move your words,

Like pieces in a chess game.

I analyze your movement, 

Like some sort of charade . 

You make promises.

So sweet, like candy for my ears.

I have a flash of memory.

So bitter, like my fallen tears.

You spit more words,

While my mind makes a decision.

I take a step back,

While you try to keep me hidden.

You grab hold of my hand,

But I've made up my mind.

You had a grip on me,

But I think about me this time.

I go back to my room now.

You plead one more chance from me.

I grab hold of the doorknob,

Quickly closing it behind as you leave.