Friday, November 28, 2014

20 Below

I originally wrote this piece almost 4 years ago.  I had the idea how of a relationship can sometimes relate to cold and harsh winter weather.  There are ups and downs and periods of warmth and cold.  Nothing is perfect.

                     ~ Someone always gets left out in the cold.~

                           

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Save Me

Too many times, we wait for someone else to catch our falls.  Finally we learn to rely on ourselves.

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Memories in Scars

Letting go isn't always easy, but eventually fate has to take its course. 

~It's all meant to be~


We've been digging deeper in our wounds.
Making chaos easier to fall back into.
I want this to work but I know it can't.
I think we're holding on, becoming trapped
Because we think we're all we have.
I want this to work but I know it can't.

You say the decision is mine to make.
I've made up my mind till I see your face.
I want you to talk me out of what I'm thinking.
Every time I want to try it seems you don't care as much.
Then I'm reminded of you. Suddenly, it's enough. 
I want you to talk me out of what I'm thinking. 

Apart, it seems so tested and I become angry. 
I don't want to get hurt by you but this is hurting me. 
Talk to me if you really want me. Show me you really want me. 
You say you'll be better but it doesn't ever come. 
My wounds ache in the wait of your front. 
Talk to me if you really want me. Show me you really want me. 

I want to make it work but feels like you don't want me. 
You're out every night while I'm home, lonely. 
It's so irrelevant, it may as well be nonexistent.
Then you come back and I feel dependency. 
I don't care how much you say you want me. 
It's so irrelevant, it may as well be nonexistent.

For a bit I thought it was over, but then the scars bled again. 
Every time we patch them up I swear it is the end. 
There's nothing left for us but it's never over. 
I pray every day for some kind of change. 
For the last time, I'll grasp your hand and let go of the pain. 
There's nothing left for us but we know it's over. 

Why did we think we could get back into this?
Building our relations over boiling toxins. 
All we have is memories in scars. 
Why did we think this time would be easy?
The time wasted wasn't very pleasing. 
All we have is memories in scars. 

I'm slipping slowly away in the night. 
Your absence no longer needs a fight. 
I'm giving in and letting go. 
I think I'll remember these days one day, 
But for now it's better to rest the wounds at bay. 
I'm giving in and letting go. 

I just need to let it go. 
We just need to let it all be. 
Nothing's sure to know,
But we'll be better off, you'll see. 
Just promise you won't forget me. 

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Mad Man Bad Man


~ Flash a fancy anything, but love cannot be bought ~ 




What's that? I see a little smile.
Wide-eyed, with such a pristine title.
But does that really entitle you 
To all that you do?

Flash your fancy papers at me.
So sure, you're the one I need
But what I really need is
My independence.

Pick me up in a pretty car,
Paying for dinner is such an art,
Buy me my hearts desire,
You'll get me hanging on a wire.

You think you're good, you think you're good for me,
But you don't know anything.
You underestimate everything I am,
But, baby, you can't buy hand.
Mad man bad man mad man bad man.
You're no good for me.

Diamonds in a box pale blue.
Think it'll score points for you.
I see what you're trying to do
But you're really not that cute.

Trophy wife is how you see me.
Though you have your night time sweetie.
Don't play with my jealousy 
I can be greedy.

Dinner at the club is a bore,
Having more makes you adored,
Mistake passion for fire,
You'll get me hanging off a wire.

You think you're good, you think you're good for me,
But you don't know anything.
You underestimate everything I am,
But, baby, you can't buy hand.
Mad man bad man mad man bad man.
You're no good for me.

Hypnotize me with a fancy car,
Paying for dinner is such an art,
Dinner at the club is a bore,
Having more makes you adored,
Buy me my heart's desire,
But you add gas to this fire.

You think you're good, you think you're good for me,
But you don't know anything.
You underestimate everything I am,
But, baby, you can't buy hand.
Mad man bad man mad man bad man.
You're no good for me.

You're not good for me.
Mad man bad man mad man bad man.
You're no good for me.


Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Sealed With A Kiss


There's only so much you can say to get your point across.

~ Read my lips. ~


I'm trying to find the right words to say to you.
Every time I try to say what's on my mind you distract me.
I get lost in everything I thought I hated about you.
You pull me in and disregard all that I'm asking.

If I could put it all in a couple words,
Maybe what I say would finally work.

It's not fair what you're doing.
It's not fair you ring me out.
I don't know what you're pursuing,
But I know I'm feeling such doubt .
Thanks for the fun times.
If I were ignorant, it'd be bliss.
In the end, I might be all right.
All I know is this note won't be sealed with a kiss.

I have it all straightened out, exactly what I'll say.
There's not stopping getting this point across this time.
But so easily I give in to your trickery ways.
There's no excuse, what you do really isn't fine.

If I could put it all in a couple words,
Maybe what I say would finally work.

It's not fair how you have me.
It's not fair how free you are.
I don't know what you do nightly,
But you know I trust so hard.
Thanks for those cool times.
If I were ignorant, it'd be bliss.
In the end, I might be all right.
All I know is this note won't be sealed with a kiss.

Maybe I'll use old fashioned calligraphy.
I'll create my own fancy wax seal.
You'll say you want to see me, baby.
Well, baby, you'll just have to deal.
Read the words that have been on the tip of my lips.
Don't read it sweetly, I won't seal it with a kiss.

It's not fair what you're doing.
It's not fair you ring me out.
I don't know what you're pursuing,
But I know I'm feeling such doubt.

It's not fair how you have me.
It's not fair how free you are.
I don't know what you do nightly,
But you know I trust so hard.
Thanks for those average times.
I'm not ignorant, so this isn't bliss.
In the end, I know I'll be all right.
For you, this note won't ever be sealed with a kiss.

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Mad Hatter

I started writing this lyrical poem over 2 years ago with the idea of the Mad Hatter.  Alice in Wonderland is one of my favorite Disney movies. I had to use it as inspiration for at least one of my songs.

~ "WE'RE ALL MAD HERE." ~


I'm falling down this path again.
Hello, hello Wonderland.

He steps on shattered cups of tea, Mad Hatter.
He lives oh so dangerously, Mad Hatter.
I can see through his mismatched eyes.
I'm falling. He plays with my mind.

"Alice, Alice," I hear falling down the hole.
"Alice, Alice," his voice claims my soul.
Mad Hatter Mad Hatter Mad Hatter....

What are you sipping in your tea?
Little bottles scream "drink me!"
I've been offered lovely pastries.
I can feel the spell eat me.
Mad Hatter has all of me,
Never setting free.
Mad Hatter take all of me,
In Wonderland for eternity.

A cat tells me not to trust, Mad Hatter.
Think I've fallen in love, Mad Hatter.
There are rips in my dress from tea.
This pretend has become my reality.


"Alice, Alice," I hear falling down the hole.
"Alice, Alice," his voice claims my soul.
Mad Hatter Mad Hatter Mad Hatter....


What are you sipping in your tea?
Little bottles scream "drink me!"
I've been offered lovely pastries.
I can feel the spell eat me.
Mad Hatter has all of me,
Never setting free.
Mad Hatter take all of me,
In Wonderland for eternity.

When I fall down the rabbit's hole,
He said he'll never let me go.
He'll lead me through Wonderland.
He didn't want to hurt me.
So he pushed me out of Wonderland.
But there was something in that tea.
Wonderland is my reality.

Now I'm going mad. Mad. Mad...

What are you sipping in your tea?
Little bottles scream "drink me!"
I've been offered lovely pastries.
I can feel the spell eat me.
Mad Hatter has all of me,
Never setting free.
Mad Hatter take all of me,
In Wonderland for eternity.

His wicked smile steals my soul, Mad Hatter.
Taking back what he stole, Mad Hatter.
I'm falling down this path again.
Hello, hello to Wonderland.