Hush.

Sometimes we have to be our own guardian angels. 

~ Sing me a lullaby. ~

Hush.

I promise I will always protect you.

I will do everything it takes.

I'm the one you can turn to.

I promise to scare all the monsters away.

Hush.

Did you have a nightmare?

Come, come and lay next to me.

I promise to always be there.

I promise the perfect role model I'll be.

Hush.

I can see you're crying now.

I'll wipe away the tear for you.

I swear I will never allow 

An unhappy day for you.

Hush.

Don't worry about my monsters.

I promised I'd keep you safe.

I promised you would never get hurt.

I'm here to keep all your monsters away.

Hush.

My monsters have taken over my mind,

But I still try to dry your tears.

You see me crying late at night.

I close the door and try to face my fears.

Hush.

This isn't a topic to be discussed. 

You're supposed to look up to me.

But I can't protect you because

Now I'm deep in my disease.

Hush.

I try to keep you out of the situation,

But you feel so much more alone.

I fall deeper into my frustration.

You take on something I'll never know.

Hush.

You watch me as I struggle in my war.

You take on a burden I'll never see.

Our roles switch like never before.

Now, you're the one protecting me.

Hush.

You take on so much.

You live it in your mind.

You were so young.

You step back this time.

Hush.

Then I think I've finally won, 

But I'll never really talk about it with you. 

You're still feeling numb. 

I think it'll protect you from my monsters too. 

Hush.

If I don't talk about it, it wasn't real. 

You bottle it up in your own way. 

If I don't talk about it, this isn't how you feel. 

You're just a kettle waiting to blow one day. 

Hush.

I'm sorry I left you in the dark. 

I'm sorry I engulfed you in my pain. 

I wanted to leave a protective mark.

Instead, I put so much strain.

Hush.

Please, don't say a word. 

Let me sing you to sleep,

Like the lullaby with the mockingbird.

You really saved me.

Hush.

Please, don't say a word.

Until you're safe in your dreams, it won't end,

Like the lullaby with the mockingbird.

I promise I will be the one to protect you again.

Hush.

What You Wanted

Isn't this what you wanted?

~ It's never what you thought it would be. ~

I'm not really sure just happened. 

I can't speak about it because no one else is talking. 

What if I'm wrong? What if I it's what I wanted?

Then, why does it feel so lethal and so haunting?

I don't know what to think anymore. 

You were getting comfortable inside my mind. 

I listened with such obedience. 

I was swayed far too easily time and time. 

But is it what I really wanted?

No, I remember my voice grasping firmly on the word. 

As I sat there repeating it,

You were out for yourself without giving me any concern. 

I did this to myself, that's what you told me.

But I trusted you and you used that to your advantage. 

I thought I knew you and I trusted you. 

But you saw me as an opportunity to further your antics. 

I'm seeing flashes of those times. 

I didn't quite understand what happened then. 

Finally, I gave in and admitted to someone. 

And the meaning was brought to my attention. 

Well I guess you finally got what you wanted. 

Just another in your long list of conquests. 

Somehow I know I had it easier than them. 

So, why is my mind forever in a state of detest?

They tell me to get over it and move on. 

Why do the flashes in my mind still taunt me?

It's in the past, I try to tell myself. 

But when I think I'm happy, those times still haunt me. 

You're truly the master of deception. 

You think we're all pawns in your game. 

I'm glad I was strong enough to break free. 

The unstable thoughts in your mind are truly to blame. 

I would speak up,

But no one ever listens. 

So I'll keep my mouth shut,

And pray you change your condition.  

I would feel sorry for you,

But I can't even feel sorry for me. 

You're incapable of love. 

You're incapable of anything. 

Mind Games

Not everyone is good at following the rules.

~ I win. ~

I'm back in a game I was long ago,

Dazzled by hopes and dreams that glowed.

I played along but something did change.

Every twist and turn, boiled a rage.

I played along and it consumed me,

Played until what I have isn't what you need.

I started to take my pieces off the board,

But you made me play the game some more.

You raged as I tried to retaliate.

You held me back, and I began to saturate,

With mirroring images of all your pain.

Whispers filled me with your games.

You pull me in to another round.

I've played before, but I've learned how

To hold my own. You've learned too.

You've learned new tricks that are ready for use.

You try them out on me day by day.

I keep reading the rules of how to play

To figure out why you test what works.

Why you still play your way without concerns. 

I can feel the rage coming again.

I fill with your whispers, and then,

Just because things didn't go your way,

You play me like a child with your mind games.

I caught you like one of those diseases.

You made me like one of your pieces,

Something only to move in your favor,

But I never wanted to be one of the players.

You never paid attention to my wishes.

You shot down all of the competition.

But these games can't go on forever.

I see through to the truth of your endeavors.

Your cards are beginning to wear thin.

Your directions are ripping.

Your whispers are blurring out with time.

Your games are quickly gone from my mind.

Salvation

Sometimes all you need is a steady anchor to save you. 

~ Stop the ride. ~

I was stuck on an endless rotation,

A carnival ride that wouldn't end. 

I didn't know all I needed was salvation,

One steady thing to bring me back again. 

I was comfortable always looking down,

Thinking what I saw was all I'd ever see.

When I wasn't looking you came around.

You stopped this ride for me.

I was content living in my comfortable state.

I thought this was the way to live my life, 

But I was afraid of an unpredictable fate.

I was afraid to get off this dizzy ride.

You came around, when I thought i didn't need it.

So effortlessly you changed me.

You came around and saved me from my demons.

So effortlessly you saved me.

You broke me out of this endless cycle.

You don't even know all you've done.

You helped me make my life full

And realize what I could truly become.

You helped me off this carnival ride finally.

No more endless rotation. 

Because the day you met me,

Is the day I finally found salvation.

Crystal Heart

Sometimes fate finds you when you least expect it.

~ Be patient. ~

Your voice is still clear in my mind.

I still feel your arms holding me close.

We said goodnight quite some while ago,

But you're stuck in my mind like a song I know. 

I hold my breath until I see you again.

You replay the last recording in your mind.

Minutes suddenly become millenniums,

And our thoughts ache more with time.

We wake up and fall asleep again.

A crystal heart hangs from a chain.

We find each other in our dreams.

Pictures add up to sums in frames.

Finally, I see your face and it lights up,

As though you're meeting a queen.

You hold me even closer,

As if we were apart for an eternity.

We walk in the crowded city,

Just two people part of an entire sea,

But we're the only ones who matter.

We're the only ones we see.

You see me shiver in the outside air 

And wrap one arm around me.

Like two pieces in a puzzle,

Our fingers intertwine so perfectly.

Your eyes are locked onto mine.

My head finds home on your chest.

We've found our fantasies in each other.

Our active minds can finally rest.